How it feels to have PDA

Good evening everyone!  

It's now been a fair few months since I was last on here, and for a good reason too... I have had the pleasure of working at Aurora Poppyfield School from the end of January to keep me busy, which I can say is very similar to Grafham Grange. Only with a fewer behavioural challenges. Unfortunately, my time there has now come to an end after Easter break due to permanent staff being hired in each class.

During my time at Poppyfield, I got to expand my knowledge of SEMH and how it differently affects different pupils in each class. Much like in every previous SEMH school settings I have worked in after Grafham. Also during my time working at Poppyfield, I got to gain more skills in working with students who happen to have something called Pathological Demand Avoidance, or PDA for short.

There was this one boy in year 7, who I was working closely with a majority of my time at the school, who had a complex level of needs. All of which include, ASD, ADHD, SEMH, Trauma, SPD, and of course... PDA. Obviously, I will not be naming this person for identification protection reasons, but I can share with you what I have learned about PDA just from spending time with this pupil, and turning it into another insightful post.

So, many of you reading this now will no doubt be thinking: "What on earth is PDA all about? I've never heard of it before." I'd say, try working with a pupil with PDA, then you'll find out for yourself.

To answer that question, PDA is where a person will avoid doing tasks and/or following instructions given by another person. Particularly from teachers. Although, it is important to keep in mind that people with PDA are not trying to be difficult in any way at all when it comes to not doing what they are told to do. This is because many kids living with PDA, are often overpowered anxiety, and in order to for them to feel safe & secure, they need to be in control of everything they are doing. 

To phrase the above explanation shorter, kids with PDA are constantly living in "survival mode".

As a good example, I'll use the pupil at Poppyfield I was working a lot with. He would almost NEVER go into the classroom to do any work, as his mind is constantly in survival mode whilst at school. And given the amount of needs this pupil has to cope with all at once, the very small demand of doing a simple worksheet will plunge him into overwhelm overdrive.

As a result, this pupil will do things to his own agenda just to feel secure, and in control to help him survive the school day without feeling threatened by anything that triggers his PDA. Even if this includes playing games with him all day. With that said, it's vitally important to be able to build trust with PDA pupils before you can even think about getting them to do what YOU want them to do.

God forbid, I know I have certainly struggled with this, and will probably still do to this day if I get to work with any PDA pupils again in the nearby future.

I hope everyone has found this little piece of PDA expertise helpful. Bye for now!

*I began this post on the 13/4, but didn't finish it until the 14/4*

A year into my SEMH journey...

Good evening everyone, just a quick for tonight, as this will be the only time I will get to make an appearance on here this week. This was also a post I was meant to do for this Tuesday, but I had non-work related demands to do throughout that day.

As of this Tuesday (25th of November), it officially marks 1 year that I've been on an SEMH journey! And what a challenging, but fascinating journey it has been for the past 12 months too, as before that, I have had absolutely no idea that the acronym SEMH exists, let alone what SEMH consists of as well within young people I work with during my past year of working in education as well. (I will get round to doing another post about my 1 year journey working in education too, don't you worry!😉)

As a reminder for those of you who are new to my blog, and do not know what SEMH stands for, it stands for social, emotional, mental health. This is a term to describe a young person who experiences difficulties with functioning in social settings due to mental health complications. Along with this, young people with SEMH display challenging behaviours due to some trauma that they have experienced in their early stages of life.

As some of you will already know, as well as for those who are, again. new to my blog, I have spent a good 6 months working at a SEMH school in Surrey, where they cater for SEMH pupils. I started there on the 25/11 of last year - the 23/05 of this year through an education agency. Although my SEMH journey continued from that point on too by working in similar SEMH settings.

During those 6 months, I have learned a hell of a lot about how SEMH impacts a young person's functioning, interactions & how they vision the world. Even though the trauma that comes with SEMH is not something I'd wish on anybody, I am more amazingly baffled of how the creative & determined side of SEMH plays a hugely positive part on an SEMH young person's overall development.

This is due to the fact that SEMH can form a link of best friends to co-occur with it, such as ASD or ADHD.

As I've seen for myself whilst working at Grafham Grange for 6 months, I have come across some very knowledgeable young pupils when it came to having a conversation with them about their hobbies/interests/aspirations. They will go to great lengths to know the ins & outs of something, and they take wonderful pride in sharing that knowledge with us too!

This was also the same case from when I had spend 3 days working at Leith Hill School, as I've had the pleasure of getting to know the pupils there by having conversations with them about things that interest them, as well as seeing them interact with one another who all have the same primary educational need.

In a nutshell, I feel very privileged to obtain all of this in-dept knowledge of SEMH, including getting to work in schools consisting of SEMH pupils. 

Long may it continue.

The lighter side of SEMH

Hello everyone! Hope your week is getting off to a great start, as well as the first 6 days of October.

From the 1st - 3rd of October, I had the privilege to work 3 days at an independent SEMH school in Dorking. Although I didn't get offered a contract to work at the school, I enjoyed spending time with the pupils, as well as get to learn about how their SEMH needs impact their learning. 

This was where I got to see a more lighter side of SEMH, compared to the other SEMH school I worked at for 6 months.

My main inspiration for doing this post, was how blown away I was by seeing a completely different side of SEMH, as appose to the stereotypical disruptive behaviour, swearing & frequent deregulations.

The different side of SEMH included loads of politeness, wanting to engage in lessons & thriving on consistent routine.

Yes, I have seen very few deregulations whilst I was working there, but those deregulations will always be a part of SEMH kids, as this is their natural response to them being or finding something that is overwhelming them, and need to let out some energy to regulate themselves again. For example, taking a movement break.

I know I have mentioned this in a few previous SEMH posts whilst I was working at Grafham Grange, as I am continually putting this message out there for everyone reading to acknowledge (I suppose you can call me an SEMH activist at this stage).

As this is also an 'independent' school setting, the staff highly or fully expect all of their students to follow the structure & routine without needing any assistance. That being said, a majority of the pupils are capable of doing work on their own.

So, the morale of this post, is to understand that no SEMH person presents with the same behaviour. Especially in different school settings.

Tips on how to form a good working relationship with SEMH students

Hello everyone! Hope you're all doing good.

As the above title states, I thought I'd share some useful tips on how to form a good working relationship with SEMH students. This is especially handy for anyone who is looking into going into this industry. Not to mention that the benefits that come out of this feel immensely rewarding too!

However, I must warn you that the process of forming a good relationship with SEMH students can come with a fair share of emotional obstacles along the way... As I have experienced...

DO:

• Be polite by saying "morning" to them - Even if you see the students walking around who you barely know, it's always good to greet them warmly first thing in school. Especially how it can really secretly brighten up their mood, as they may not be warmly spoken to in that manner at home.

• Try to start a friendly conversation with them - Again, if you come across a student you barely interact with, at least pluck up the courage to begin a friendly conversation with them, such as: "How are you doing today X?" Although a majority of the students (especially the ones I didn't interact with much) will tell you to go away at times, at least they will eventually see in time that you are trying to make an effort to get to know them a bit more.

• Be firm with boundaries & behaviour - I know this will be nerve-racking, but you need to be very consistent with verbally telling students about the inappropriate behaviour they are displaying, as well as to firmly inform them of the consequences should they choose to continue with their inappropriate behaviour. Believe me, they will be thanking you inside their heads later, as SEMH kids crave on a sense of security.

DON'T:

• Keep on changing their routine during their school day - If there is 1 thing that SEMH kids HATE the most, it's definitely change. Every structured routine in their school day must be kept the same where possible, as sudden last second changes can REALLY cause SEMH kids to have some serious dysregulations! Trust me, witnessing a SEMH pupil dysregulated is not the prettiest thing to experience.

• Expect or make them do paperwork for the whole lesson - I know this may sound weird to some people, as you'd typically expect any pupil to get on with doing paperwork for an entire lesson, but with SEMH pupils, that is a different story, and this can cause them to feel tired & overwhelmed, as being in a classroom for too long can stress them out due to carrying an excessive amount of energy then other kids from non SEMH school settings. 

• Make them feel ashamed of their needs - Just because your purpose is to discipline SEMH pupils when they display inappropriate behaviour, doesn't give you the excuse to blame their needs for who they are as a person. The only thing this will do, is cause SEMH kids to have their confidence crushed, as they cannot change who they are inside.

I hope these tips will come into use for anyone who is looking into working in a SEMH environment. Especially having first-hand experience & knowledge. 

*I began this post on the 7/7, but didn't finish it until the 14/7*

How having an interest makes you more confident

Hello everyone! Hope you're all having a good day so far.

I've also just realised as I'm typing this post... We're at the halfway point of 2025 already! It's just flown by so quick!😱

Anyway, I've decided to make this blogpost based on something else that I have experienced during my time working at the SEMH school. Every single kid at that school had at least 1 or 2 special interests that made them more confident at being who they are, and how they are not afraid to show that confident & bright side of their personality to others.

Obviously, I will not be naming any names of the pupils that I have witnessed tell or showcased their special interests to me to protect their identity, but the least I can do is be specific about going into their special interests in detail on here.

There was a boy in my Y11 class, who was very fascinated into art. There was even a large, suitcase size art portfolio where all of his artwork is stashed. Every piece of artwork was inspired by the artists that he had learned about. I've seen for myself how more confident he becomes in himself, as he appreciates how much I say how his artwork is very inspirational, and how it gives him a sense of pride; To make him want to do so well in life.

There was another boy in my Y11 class, who has very in-dept knowledge of theme parks & rollercoasters. He can tell me every single fact & trivia about any rollercoaster from across the world! Again, the more I let him share his wide knowledge of theme parks & rollercoasters, the more confident he feels interacting in class, as this gives him a sense of pride.

In some cases, these interests CAN lead to you gaining a job/career in those industries, because there is a certain saying that goes along the lines of: "Choose a job you love, then you'll never have to work a day in your life." Meaning, you thrive so much with doing something you're wholeheartedly interested in, that it takes away the worry of having to apply to any job just for the sake of HAVING to work somewhere, or to show everyone you do actually work to people please them.

I hope this post was helpful to anyone who can relate as well. 

I do plan on making more blog posts next month, as I'll have some days free where I've got nothing else "out of work related" planned.

How having structure & consistency benefits SEMH pupils

Hello everyone! Hope you've all been doing okay.

Since my my last post on here, I've been keeping busy with my weekday job in an SEMH school. However, as of the 23rd of May, I no longer work at the school due to no longer being needed for the final term. (I was working in the Y11's class, but they are on study leave now, and will be leaving for good in 2 weeks time) And since I'm now currently off work until my agency calls me in to somewhere else, I've got some time to be productive on here.

As the above title states, I want to talk about structure & consistency benefitting SEMH pupils.

There are 2 reasons for this post: Firstly, there has been some major changes to the school. Secondly, I've seen the positive impact those changes have had on the pupils & their behaviour.

When the school opened up after the Christmas break (8th of January), it had marked the start of long & difficult journey. That journey was to simply make the school into a better learning environment & as well as a safe environment for the pupils.

There were 4 minor changes that took place: New uniform, English & Maths lessons every morning & addressing the staff as "sir" or "ms". We even introduced something called "isolation" (IL for short) which is where pupils will spend half a day or a full day in a separate room to do their work. The intention of this is to help the pupils reflect on their behaviour. I'm delighted to say that it was a success! Or at least for most part.

On the 25th of February, there were 2 more changes to the school curriculum, and they were both major ones... A FULL timetable of lessons & the new warning system. The intention of the warning system is to reduce the pupils' behaviour, and is also made up of 3 warnings. If a pupil gets a warning 3, they go to the inclusion hub, and they have to do a 10min detention. Failing that, then it's an IL the following day for the morning. If not, then it's an IL the WHOLE day. Failing THAT, then it leads to a suspension.

During the 5 months that I've been a part of the new changes journey, I've seen how much more settled & calmer the pupils have been! As a result, there has been a reduced number of behavioural incidents, This is why having the consistent structure & routine really helps SEMH pupils to feel more secure in a learning environment, as they know that we care about their education, as well as their mental wellbeing.

Time travelling back to the 25th of November (when I had first started working at the school), I honestly couldn't believe how dysfunctional it was back then, where there were hardly any lessons going on, no timetable structure & there were behaviour incidents happening every single day. Sometimes even a few times a day. It was just insane. I couldn't even imagine how unsettled those pupils must have been feeling back then without the consistent structure & routine. They were scared, anxious & dysregulated (a cliché from that school). Ofsted even gave the school an "inadequate" rating, due to poor leadership & management.

To this day, yes, there will still be some pupil dysregulations, but that doesn't put a small dent on all of the positive progress the school have been making. If anything, the school is only getting better every single day! I'm also optimistic enough that Ofsted will give them a much better rating.

As a youth worker, it really makes me heart warmed to see vulnerable young people thrive in life. Especially those with a complicated background. 

An insight to SEMH: A new journey

Hello everyone! Well, what can I say, it's obviously been a long time since I was last active on here. And there are 2 reasons why...

I suppose the 1st one being I couldn't be bothered.

The 2nd one, however, is because I now have a weekday job in a SEMH school. To be more precist, I began this new job on the 25th of November of last year.

Since I have a day of nothing today, (which rarely happens anymore these days!😂) I thought I'd make use of it by utilizing the time to make this post. 

As the above title states, I will be talking about the 'ins & outs' of SEMH. I will also be sharing how much I have learned about SEMH.

You're probably asking: "What does SEMH stand for?"

SEMH stands for Social, Emotional & Mental Health.

Now you're asking: "What is Social, Emotional & Mental Health?"

Social, Emotional & Mental Health is a complex mental health condition, where people experience significant struggles with managing their behaviour & emotions. Alongside this, they may show inappropriate behaviour & language when it comes to reacting to a demand that they do not want to do. An example of this could be being told to undertake 3 pages of Maths work.

A person with SEMH will often feel anxious & insecure most of the time, as they feel like they are no good at anything due to all of the trauma, humiliation & shame that they have experienced whilst growing up. Moreover, they will most likely feel intimidated by other people who seem "normal" to them. Or even try to compare themselves to any "normal" person.

In no way at all are people with SEMH bad with an unruly attitude, they are simply scared by all of the trauma & abuse that they have been through in their early stages of life. Even I can say for myself that I've seen/heard people with SEMH do incredible things! For example, they can obtain phenomenal knowledge about an industry that they are interested in. Especially the practical industries.

It is essentially mindful to know when you encounter a person with SEMH being dysregulated, they are NOT doing it with the intention of choosing to cause disruption. They are in that emotional state, because they have no other coping mechanisms. This is what is known as a "fight or flight" response.

All in all, people living with SEMH want to be like other people, as well as to be able to do things that other people do. In my opinion there isn't nearly enough SEMH awareness out there, so this is half the reason why I have made this post.

For those of you who have found this topic/post interesting, thank you for reading through, and I do plan on making more posts associated with SEMH in the future. 

Just bare in mind that I am only 3 months into this journey, so I wouldn't say I obtain a professional knowledge. I am still in the process of learning something new about SEMH everyday whilst at work. As for somebody who has been into psychology for 6 years now, I am very much looking forward to be riding on this journey...