How it feels to have PDA

Good evening everyone!  

It's now been a fair few months since I was last on here, and for a good reason too... I have had the pleasure of working at Aurora Poppyfield School from the end of January to keep me busy, which I can say is very similar to Grafham Grange. Only with a fewer behavioural challenges. Unfortunately, my time there has now come to an end after Easter break due to permanent staff being hired in each class.

During my time at Poppyfield, I got to expand my knowledge of SEMH and how it differently affects different pupils in each class. Much like in every previous SEMH school settings I have worked in after Grafham. Also during my time working at Poppyfield, I got to gain more skills in working with students who happen to have something called Pathological Demand Avoidance, or PDA for short.

There was this one boy in year 7, who I was working closely with a majority of my time at the school, who had a complex level of needs. All of which include, ASD, ADHD, SEMH, Trauma, SPD, and of course... PDA. Obviously, I will not be naming this person for identification protection reasons, but I can share with you what I have learned about PDA just from spending time with this pupil, and turning it into another insightful post.

So, many of you reading this now will no doubt be thinking: "What on earth is PDA all about? I've never heard of it before." I'd say, try working with a pupil with PDA, then you'll find out for yourself.

To answer that question, PDA is where a person will avoid doing tasks and/or following instructions given by another person. Particularly from teachers. Although, it is important to keep in mind that people with PDA are not trying to be difficult in any way at all when it comes to not doing what they are told to do. This is because many kids living with PDA, are often overpowered anxiety, and in order to for them to feel safe & secure, they need to be in control of everything they are doing. 

To phrase the above explanation shorter, kids with PDA are constantly living in "survival mode".

As a good example, I'll use the pupil at Poppyfield I was working a lot with. He would almost NEVER go into the classroom to do any work, as his mind is constantly in survival mode whilst at school. And given the amount of needs this pupil has to cope with all at once, the very small demand of doing a simple worksheet will plunge him into overwhelm overdrive.

As a result, this pupil will do things to his own agenda just to feel secure, and in control to help him survive the school day without feeling threatened by anything that triggers his PDA. Even if this includes playing games with him all day. With that said, it's vitally important to be able to build trust with PDA pupils before you can even think about getting them to do what YOU want them to do.

God forbid, I know I have certainly struggled with this, and will probably still do to this day if I get to work with any PDA pupils again in the nearby future.

I hope everyone has found this little piece of PDA expertise helpful. Bye for now!

*I began this post on the 13/4, but didn't finish it until the 14/4*

A year into my SEMH journey...

Good evening everyone, just a quick for tonight, as this will be the only time I will get to make an appearance on here this week. This was also a post I was meant to do for this Tuesday, but I had non-work related demands to do throughout that day.

As of this Tuesday (25th of November), it officially marks 1 year that I've been on an SEMH journey! And what a challenging, but fascinating journey it has been for the past 12 months too, as before that, I have had absolutely no idea that the acronym SEMH exists, let alone what SEMH consists of as well within young people I work with during my past year of working in education as well. (I will get round to doing another post about my 1 year journey working in education too, don't you worry!😉)

As a reminder for those of you who are new to my blog, and do not know what SEMH stands for, it stands for social, emotional, mental health. This is a term to describe a young person who experiences difficulties with functioning in social settings due to mental health complications. Along with this, young people with SEMH display challenging behaviours due to some trauma that they have experienced in their early stages of life.

As some of you will already know, as well as for those who are, again. new to my blog, I have spent a good 6 months working at a SEMH school in Surrey, where they cater for SEMH pupils. I started there on the 25/11 of last year - the 23/05 of this year through an education agency. Although my SEMH journey continued from that point on too by working in similar SEMH settings.

During those 6 months, I have learned a hell of a lot about how SEMH impacts a young person's functioning, interactions & how they vision the world. Even though the trauma that comes with SEMH is not something I'd wish on anybody, I am more amazingly baffled of how the creative & determined side of SEMH plays a hugely positive part on an SEMH young person's overall development.

This is due to the fact that SEMH can form a link of best friends to co-occur with it, such as ASD or ADHD.

As I've seen for myself whilst working at Grafham Grange for 6 months, I have come across some very knowledgeable young pupils when it came to having a conversation with them about their hobbies/interests/aspirations. They will go to great lengths to know the ins & outs of something, and they take wonderful pride in sharing that knowledge with us too!

This was also the same case from when I had spend 3 days working at Leith Hill School, as I've had the pleasure of getting to know the pupils there by having conversations with them about things that interest them, as well as seeing them interact with one another who all have the same primary educational need.

In a nutshell, I feel very privileged to obtain all of this in-dept knowledge of SEMH, including getting to work in schools consisting of SEMH pupils. 

Long may it continue.

The pros & cons of being an agency LSA

Hello everyone! Hope you're all doing well. Since I've been an agency LSA for a year now, I thought about doing a post based on everything I have learned about being an agency LSA, as well as talk about the pros & cons of the job.

To be more precise, I first began applying for agency LSA roles on the 3rd of November of last year, and got officially employed into my 1st one on the 8th of November (5 days later). For most part, I'd happily say that I'm enjoying it, as the role itself is genially rewarding by helping young people thrive in education. However, the job itself can be extremely demanding due to the lack of expectations that some school staff won't tell you about before you go into the school('s) to do your job. 

Without further ado, here are the pros & cons of being an agency LSA...

  Pros:

• Meeting new people everyday - One of the things I really love about my job as an agency LSA, is that I get to meet different pupils, and learn many things about them. I never know, I may even learn something from one of them or more!...

• Getting to know how each school's curriculum works - I enjoy absorbing the knowledge of how each I school I've been into is ran, as this will be useful for me to pass onto anyone who wants to know if those school settings should be recommended to their children or children they know. Moreover, different schools have different vibes!

• Seeing familiar faces - Some of the schools I have worked in, I have seen some young people that I know of from Challengers (my Saturday & holiday job). Again, I enjoy absorbing the knowledge of that some young people from most of the Challengers schemes I have worked at attend these school settings. 

Cons:

• Not getting enough time to know the pupils well - Most of the schools I have worked in (with the exception of Grafham Grange) have only been for 1 day here, a few days there & another few days somewhere else. On an honest level, I really love getting to know the pupils I work with well, as this helps me to build a good, positive & trusting relationship with them by understanding how their mind works. Especially when they eventually gain enough trust in me to be their listening ear if they need/want to offload their thoughts.

• Low expectations from teachers - The one thing that really frustrates me the most about being an agency LSA, is that the teachers in the classes I get put into do not explain to me how best to be proactive in the class or how best to engage with each pupil. All this does is not only set me up to fail if I'm doing one or more days of trail shifts, but feel like I'm only present in the class as a "spare part".

• Little - no support from agencies - Another thing that really frustrates me about this line of work, is that some agencies (and I've registered onto about 10 different ones during October) will be very dismissive of your needs/requests. In the case of some agencies I'm with, I say to them that I specifically do not want to be placed into a school where I have to work with screaming non-verbal children, as I do not have much experience of working with them, but they'll still do it anyway when they call me up asking if I am available to work on the day they call me, all simply because for the purpose of the school giving THEM wages when these agencies fill school classes up with agency LSA's to fill in the holes, as well as keep the schools running as normal.

That pretty much wraps up this post. Hope you all find these pros & cons useful just in case you work in this industry to, or even thinking about it. 

I shall be back soon with another post!

*I began this post on the 18/11, but didn't finish it until the 19/11*

The lighter side of SEMH

Hello everyone! Hope your week is getting off to a great start, as well as the first 6 days of October.

From the 1st - 3rd of October, I had the privilege to work 3 days at an independent SEMH school in Dorking. Although I didn't get offered a contract to work at the school, I enjoyed spending time with the pupils, as well as get to learn about how their SEMH needs impact their learning. 

This was where I got to see a more lighter side of SEMH, compared to the other SEMH school I worked at for 6 months.

My main inspiration for doing this post, was how blown away I was by seeing a completely different side of SEMH, as appose to the stereotypical disruptive behaviour, swearing & frequent deregulations.

The different side of SEMH included loads of politeness, wanting to engage in lessons & thriving on consistent routine.

Yes, I have seen very few deregulations whilst I was working there, but those deregulations will always be a part of SEMH kids, as this is their natural response to them being or finding something that is overwhelming them, and need to let out some energy to regulate themselves again. For example, taking a movement break.

I know I have mentioned this in a few previous SEMH posts whilst I was working at Grafham Grange, as I am continually putting this message out there for everyone reading to acknowledge (I suppose you can call me an SEMH activist at this stage).

As this is also an 'independent' school setting, the staff highly or fully expect all of their students to follow the structure & routine without needing any assistance. That being said, a majority of the pupils are capable of doing work on their own.

So, the morale of this post, is to understand that no SEMH person presents with the same behaviour. Especially in different school settings.

How a being a youth worker can create heartwarming moments with people

Hello everyone! Hope you're all having a great week so far, whatever you're doing.

Since I have a day to myself, I thought I'd share something that had happened whilst I was helping out at the Challengers Orange Aid event on Saturday. 

On Saturday, (13th of September) I had the privilege to be asked to help out at the 2nd time running annual Challengers' Orange Aid event. 

Me & my friend/colleague were in charge of manning the lego tent for the day, and I'm sure we had at least 10 kids come in to have a good build with them, as well as make one big scattered pile of different assorted legos.😂

That aside, we saw loads of other families thoroughly enjoying themselves too. Which was so lovely to see! Especially how they have such a good relationship with us as a service, and they know how well we support them whenever they need it.

I was sitting out by the lego tent for most of the day, and at one point, there was a boy who I recognised that went to the SEMH school I used to work at for 6 months (Grafham Grange). When he, and the mother were sitting close by our tent, the mother came over to me, and said that the boy recognises me from his school. He remembers my name as well. We both had a friendly chat for a few minutes, then when the mother & boy walked away, the boy said to me in a nice tone & manner: "Have a lovely day, and see you later".

This warmed my heart knowing that kids like him are perfectly capable of showing a kind personality when they are in a community friendly event. Especially when they remember you from their school setting. Fun fact: I had actually worked with this boy in IL before at my old school I used to work at, and I could hardly believe the difference in him when I saw him away from the school. This is purely all down to friendly interaction I had with him there.

Another time, there was another mother & son who approached me, and the son used to attend the previous Challengers scheme I worked at before it got shut down due to financial issues. The mother had a friendly conversation with me to begin with, by talking about how well her son is doing now since he aged out of Challengers 3 months ago.

She then kneeled by me to talk about some personal issues he'd been having over the past year (Won't go into any detail). The last few things she said was how much she appreciates as youth workers being there for the young people, like her son, as we make them feel accepted for who they are for what they are as individuals. She also added how she wants nothing else in the world other than her son to feel safe for who he is.

These are the pure reasons why I still carry on doing what I do as a youth worker, as I get to work closely with different young people by helping them be more confident with interacting with adults, as well as help them to have more confidence in themselves as they get older. The best part is when you know they know it too.🧡

How spending so much time out of an education setting can have a devastating impact on a young person

Hello everyone! How are we in September already?! I feel like this year is coming & going too fast.

Anyway, I have began a new job on Monday (1st of September) in a nearby college, and as the above title states, I want to share something very important that I have seen for myself whilst I was working there. This is all in the hope that other people reading this will find this post as insightful as it was for me having to witness it. Plus, this will give me something to do whilst I'm off work ill today as well.

On my 1st day working at a nearby college, I was working in a class where there was a boy who would not come into class, and had spent the whole day standing outside. This was all because he had been out of education for a WHOLE year. With that said, just spending 1 whole day in an education setting was enough for him to be overwhelmed, as he has unfortunately been so used to not being in one for this long. 

Now, you'll be asking yourself: "Why was this boy out of education for an entire year?" The answer was (according to my colleague) the school was having problems with him, so they couldn't cope with him anymore. This, in my eyes, is nothing other than totally unacceptable for any young person. Let alone for anyone who has special educational needs, like this boy does.

There is proven evidence that being out of any educational setting for a prolonged period of time can have a really devastating impact on young people, as they fills their head with so much uncertainty, and not having any learning in an actual learning environment makes young people feel anxious, because they will be behind everyone else, regardless whether they are neurotypical & non-neurotypical people.

Although it is valid there are loads of educational settings that are struggling to accommodate SEN kids due to a sky high new cases for ASD, ADHD or any other condition, it is NOT valid for young people with SEN to be out of education just because the education system cannot find a way to cater for their needs. This is why so many SEN kids are falling behand in life due to a lack of education. I know things are getting done to improve the statistics, but this simply cannot continue for the foreseeable...

Luckily, Challengers (the part-time organisation I work for) have 2 specialist settings in Guildford & Farnham that run during the weekday where they support people from the ages of 2 - 18 who are currently out of education. Although they are not education settings in any shape or form, they do, however, provide these young people with activities that will become really beneficial for their social & emotional development. They know what it's like when a young person with SEN feels insecure by having their education placement broken down, as well as knowing the ripple effects it has on their families.

To gain a more visualised insight, I have attached a video:

How the power of play is so impactful on young people

Hello everyone! Hope you've all had a good August, I know I have!

I say that, as I was working during the weekday for 3 weeks from the 28th of July - the 19th of August. Not to mention that I got to enjoy myself doing other things over the weekends in between as well. I even had a an enjoyable holiday from the 20th and only got back home yesterday (the 28th).

Since I have downtime for most of today, I thought I'd do a post on here which is inspired by the Challengers' Impact Report of 2025. Especially how my life involves that place at the moment. It will mainly consist of how play is so vitally important to help young people with various disabilities navigate the world.

One of the core values at Challengers, is to NEVER exclude anyone regardless of how complex their needs are. This is done to ensure that they all fit, as well as interact with every other young person on scheme who all have similar needs to them.

Now, let's talk about inclusivity... What do we do at Challengers to ensure every young person feels included on scheme? The answer couldn't be much simpler, we provide a range of activities which are all accessible to suite every young person's need. Even if the activities are not accessible to some young people at first, we will always make every effort to make them accessible to those young people.

This also leads me to the next rhetorical question... How do all of the staff at Challengers let the young people have fun playing on scheme? We (as staff members) undergo regular safeguarding, first aid & crisis drills training to ensure every young person who comes on scheme is in safe hands & well looked after. To this extent, we get visits from Ofsted to check we meet the safeguarding needs that Challengers provides to young people.

And the big rhetorical question... Why are both of these things blended together so vitally important for young people to play on scheme? This is because we are dedicated to bringing laughter & smiles out of these young people despite the challenging behaviour that they present us with. Although in all of the schemes I've worked in, it's some more than others. Allowing challenging young people to play really helps them to become more happier, and they can demonstrate that (verbally or not) by interacting with us, as they rarely get so much of that much needed intensive interaction elsewhere. Some young people are even aware of how well we look after their medical needs, as we will always welcome them with warm arms into our schemes where no other place would due to how complex their medical or behaviour needs are.

To see the evidence for yourselves, I have attached the Impact Report of 2025: https://disability-challengers.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Challengers-Impact-Report-2024-25.pdf

*I began this post on the 29/8, but didn't finish it until the 30/8*

Tips on how to form a good working relationship with SEMH students

Hello everyone! Hope you're all doing good.

As the above title states, I thought I'd share some useful tips on how to form a good working relationship with SEMH students. This is especially handy for anyone who is looking into going into this industry. Not to mention that the benefits that come out of this feel immensely rewarding too!

However, I must warn you that the process of forming a good relationship with SEMH students can come with a fair share of emotional obstacles along the way... As I have experienced...

DO:

• Be polite by saying "morning" to them - Even if you see the students walking around who you barely know, it's always good to greet them warmly first thing in school. Especially how it can really secretly brighten up their mood, as they may not be warmly spoken to in that manner at home.

• Try to start a friendly conversation with them - Again, if you come across a student you barely interact with, at least pluck up the courage to begin a friendly conversation with them, such as: "How are you doing today X?" Although a majority of the students (especially the ones I didn't interact with much) will tell you to go away at times, at least they will eventually see in time that you are trying to make an effort to get to know them a bit more.

• Be firm with boundaries & behaviour - I know this will be nerve-racking, but you need to be very consistent with verbally telling students about the inappropriate behaviour they are displaying, as well as to firmly inform them of the consequences should they choose to continue with their inappropriate behaviour. Believe me, they will be thanking you inside their heads later, as SEMH kids crave on a sense of security.

DON'T:

• Keep on changing their routine during their school day - If there is 1 thing that SEMH kids HATE the most, it's definitely change. Every structured routine in their school day must be kept the same where possible, as sudden last second changes can REALLY cause SEMH kids to have some serious dysregulations! Trust me, witnessing a SEMH pupil dysregulated is not the prettiest thing to experience.

• Expect or make them do paperwork for the whole lesson - I know this may sound weird to some people, as you'd typically expect any pupil to get on with doing paperwork for an entire lesson, but with SEMH pupils, that is a different story, and this can cause them to feel tired & overwhelmed, as being in a classroom for too long can stress them out due to carrying an excessive amount of energy then other kids from non SEMH school settings. 

• Make them feel ashamed of their needs - Just because your purpose is to discipline SEMH pupils when they display inappropriate behaviour, doesn't give you the excuse to blame their needs for who they are as a person. The only thing this will do, is cause SEMH kids to have their confidence crushed, as they cannot change who they are inside.

I hope these tips will come into use for anyone who is looking into working in a SEMH environment. Especially having first-hand experience & knowledge. 

*I began this post on the 7/7, but didn't finish it until the 14/7*

How working at Disability Challengers feels so rewarding

Hello everyone! I cannot believe it's now the 1st of March already?! I swear NYD still felt like it happened yesterday?!

Anyway, enough hyperbole. I know it's been a month since I was last active on here, as my work-life is heavily getting in the way of that. Especially with my new job. However, I have an unexpected day off work today, so I thought I'd make an appearance back on here again.

As the above title states, I feel like I should talk about how rewarding my job at Disability Challengers is, as well as how does it personally make me feel rewarded.

For those of you who have never heard of Disability Challengers, it is a charity-based job where it primarily consists of interacting with children with disabilities, as well as providing them with fun activities.

And as the company name states, every child comes with a unique set of behaviours. Hence I also manage those children's behaviours whilst having fun interacting with them on scheme.

Working at Disability Challengers feels so rewarding for me, as I am (let's not leave out my colleagues/friends here as well!) providing a safe, playful & overall fun environment for our service users. The backstory of this reason is due to the fact that they may have nowhere else to go & have fun, as other people view their disability as a burden.

I personally like to vision myself as a superhero at the end of every shift. This is because helping people helps me to become a better person in life, and I tend to thrive on the very thought of me visioning myself as a "superhero".

In fact, the last 10 months I have been working at Disability Challengers has made me develop into a more better person. Both physically & mentally. This is because I had the pleasure of working alongside some amazing & all round lovely people, (particularly on the schemes I work at) who accept me for who I am as a person, which help me to gain more confidence when working as a team.

*I began this post on the 1/3/24, but didn't finish it until the 2/3/24*

Why facing your fears makes your mind feel more powerful

Hello everyone! This was something that I did with my work colleagues at Challengers this past Saturday. (9/9/23) If you want to find out more, click on this link to view: Basingstoke Team Abseil Spinnaker Tower for Disability Challengers

And because there is psychology involved with facing your fears, I thought about mixing in my facing my fears experience along with talking about the benefits & outcomes in the same post.

*An action shot of me abseiling down Spinnaker Tower in Portsmouth, UK*

My personal experience with facing my fears:

Let me tell you, it's not very often that I get to abseil from something that is stood tall at 100m! 

Prior to my abseiling experience with my work colleagues, I have always been jittery about dangling over a height. Hence, I rarely got to do any abseiling at all. What I mean when I say being jittery about heights, is me being up a height where I can look down it. 

However, as soon as I saw the opportunity to sign up to the Spinnaker Tower abseil, in aid of raising money for work, I immediately jumped at the chance. This was mainly because I wanted to challenge myself by abseiling from a height of 100m. Besides, if I didn't do this, I knew I was only going to regret it.

Fast forward to when I was abseiling down the tower, the waiting by the abseiling platform (where I waited to be clipped up to my abseiling rope) was a bit nerve-racking, as I had to wait for 2 of my colleagues to go down first. Once I got the rope clip on process out of the way, I proceeded to position myself onto the tower wall. (Where I was abseiling down) I thought to myself: "The quicker I get going with my abseil, the less time I will have feeling nervous." Although, as a matter of fact, I was actually feeling excited/nervous combined.

The second I hit the floor, I felt so accomplished & mentally powerful that I feel like I can do anything involving heights!

Benefits & outcomes:

As well as debriefing about my personal experience with facing my fears, I will say hands down that being able to face your own fears (whatever they may be) head on, will make you feel more powerful in physical appearance & in mind. With that said, being scared is good for the mindset, as the feeling helps it to grow stronger.

I suppose the overall benefit of facing your fears, would be to do them more often, as if they suddenly became second nature to you. An example of this would be climbing up a 40ft height everyday.

If you've reached this far in reading this lengthy post, all I can say is well done, as well as thank you. And I hope this post has taught you all something new by feeling inspired to go out & face your fears.

The best way to understand people's behaviour

This is a post which will be relating to my job as a disability play/youth worker. Not only that, but I will also be dishing out tips & advice for the best way to get to understand children & young people with complex needs.

What does a play/youth worker do?

A play/youth worker is a member of staff who works on play or youth scheme, (or in my case, Disability Challengers) and basically gets to work with children & young people while they get to have fun playing on scheme.

However, a playworker doesn't just play with children & young people, a play/youth worker also has an important job to ensure everyone is safe while playing on scheme. This is essentially called safeguarding.

Going into safeguarding, I, as a play/youth worker, must keep my vigilance at all times when it comes to children & young people's behaviours. This is because behaviour can either be represented verbally or physically, which could eventually become a risk to everyone on scheme, as well as themselves. If a behaviour really was to escalate into the too dangerous category, then a play/youth worker will have no choice but to perform a safety intervention. (SI) This is where a play/youth worker (who MUST be trained in SI to do this) physically removes a child or young person off from another person if they are physically hurting them.

All in all though, a play/youth worker ensures any child or young person has the best day on scheme regardless.

What is the best way to understand children & young people with complex needs?

We always do a briefing 15mins prior to the children or young people coming onto scheme. This helps us to get to know the children or young people who will be coming in for the day, as we get to read through their information sheet. Or as we call them, CIS's.

I'll use the example if I was to going get put with a 1:1 child or young person for the morning & another for the afternoon. I usually let that 1:1 child or young person do what they want to do, so it helps me to understand what they like to do best on scheme. I also pay close attention to how they communicate, whether they use a device, body language, noises or just verbally talking. No 2 people I work/interact 1:1 with are the same. 

If I was to bullet point some handy tips for you all when it comes to working with children or young people with complex needs at a place like Disability Challengers, they'll be things like:

• Always communicate to non-verbals using sign language, as they would benefit from this more
• Ensure you read through their CIS's thoroughly, so you know how to handle them on scheme
• Never show your impatience with trying to get your 1:1 to do something, like going to the toilet, as A) It will make yourself look unprofessional, and B) It may traumatize them
• Never punish a child or young person if they did something wrong on scheme, like hitting someone, as it is not our protocol to give them punishments
• Always listen to what any child or young person comes up & says to you on scheme, as they feel like they can open up to you about anything on their mind
• If you get asked to hang around with the non-1:1's on scheme, do try to interact with them all, because some of them may feel lonely without staff interaction
• In relations to hanging out with the non-1:1's on scheme, try to get them all playing together

I think that's pretty much everything covered for this long post now. 

Anyway, I hope my personal insight to what I do at work, as well as my tips has provided sine useful insight for anyone wishing to work as a play/youth worker one day.

If anyone has made it all the way down to this point, I just like to thank you for taking the time to read all of the way through, and I shall hopefully be back very soon with another post!

*I began this post on the 12/8/23, but didn't get round to finishing it until the 18/8/23*